Belated New Year's Post

In lieu of the usual New Year's Resolutions [which I don't even bother with in the first place], I present to you my New Year's Delusions:

1. Stop swearing, even in my blogs, and even the euphemistic kind of swearing. It's just freakin' unladylike.
2. In the same vein, be more ladylike.
3. Stop buying books.
4. Well, books are really good for the mind and soul. So scratch the last one and make it: stop buying post-its and note pads.
5. Stop eating junk foods.
6. Wear skirts regularly to work.
7. Organize on a regular basis my junk office files and workpapers.
8. Be friendly, charming and nice to everyone, including annoying officemates, annoying brothers, and annoying strangers.
9. Aspire to maintain a regular, intelligent, highly useful and entertaining blog wherein I refrain from talking about myself, dispensing my opinions, and narrating the boring and nonsense happenings of my life.
10. Add 3 inches to my height. This is the biggest delusion of them all. No, wait, the biggest delusion is my height. If you want to know why, ask me how tall I am.