Sunday, September 28, 2008

Blogspot: 4 - Jela: 0

Or, The I'm-Not-Yet-Dead Post.

I'm still alive, but real life pretty much happened in the last couple of weeks and got in the way of my blog life. I got frustrated a lot of times because a lot of things kept happening but none of it really does matter in a big way, and... I don't know. I don't want to rant, plus you wouldn't understand me anyway, I'm just tired of putting up with other people's misery - or what they imagined as their misery - and, just suck it all up like an adult, dude.

I pretty much resent the fact that I don't have time for some of my friends. You know who you are, and I'm really sorry.

Anyway, so my post title refers to my bouts with self over whether I want to delete my blog or not. Obviously, blogger is winning so far, but no matter how lopsided the score is, I only need to get one point and this blog loses. I keep wondering why I'm still blogging anyway. It's not even a tool to keep up with friends because only a handful knows about its existence. I'm not blogging for money or for any ranking. Or for literary recognition, heaven forbid.

I already hate my layout and I can't find a decent one. My blog reads like a whole random, senseless rambling with no cohesive structure. It's like I just talk and talk about nothing.

But maybe that's it. That's the reason why I blog, because that's who I am - I just like to talk and talk and talk. And sometimes, no one's there to listen. This has been my sounding board, and as pathetic as it may sound, I really don't care whether anyone would care to read it or not.

One day I would just walk away from this blog. But for now, I think I'm staying.

(I already removed the stupid countdown for the Harry Potter movie because every time I see it, I just want to punch something. Anyway, there's a new countdown here, this time for the book Tales of Beedle the Bard. Joy already promised that she would buy me one, but does anyone know if the book will be sold locally?)

Edit: fuck. what's wrong with blogger's formatting?!

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