That’s the good part of this entry. The bad part is that I’m trying NOT to write the Top 5 Reasons Why I’m Not
I’m not immune to the whole “parenthood is very rewarding” thing. I’ve seen how becoming a father made my eldest brother a more responsible, more patient, less temperamental person and I like how much he dotes on my nephew. I can see the same thing with my new-dad brother: he’s normally stoic but you can sense his excitement and nervousness when his wife went into labor. He changes the diaper, washes the bottles, arranges the crib and puts the baby to sleep. (I try not to laugh at his choice of lullaby (it’s that TV ad that goes: “bata ka pa pero kaya mo na…”) because I haven’t even attempted to sing a lullaby to Leila). (And I know I came across as too surprised that my brothers are this involved in the parenting of their children but that’s not because I don’t believe men are not responsible enough, only that my brothers are not exactly the most dependable brothers around.)
Parenting is a, pardon the cliché, 24/7 job. You don’t even have performance bonuses to look forward to for doing a good job. Right now, seeing Leila stop squirming to pay attention to our cooing and baby-talking (or non baby-talking - most of us talk to her like she’s an adult already) is our sort of reward. It's kind of nice, really.
But I don’t see why parenthood should be the only path to a rewarding life. I’m not trying to make this into a single vs. married debate, what I just want to say is that just because I’m
So, yeah, right now I am nowhere near being a Mom. I hope one day I could be. In the meantime, I must learn not to panic when little Leila starts to cry.