Monday, May 19, 2008


I’m not very emotional – at least, I don’t think I am. Some would say that’s being matapang, that I know how to reign in my emotions. But often, it makes me feel alone.

I’ve been sad for a few months already, and that’s because my brother and my nephew will be leaving for New Zealand. Most days I succeed in burying that sad feeling with piles of work, books to read, or TV shows to watch. Lately, the feeling is hard to shake off. They’ll be leaving in less than a week’s time; just when you want the days to slow down, it seems that the inevitable has a nasty way of swiftly creeping up on you.

But that’s not to say I’m not happy with their decision to stick as a family. I am happy for them; I am proud of my brother for making this decision. It’s just so hard to imagine my brother and nephew not being physically here. I know I always complain about being evicted from my own bedroom whenever they sleep over in our house, but who am I fooling? I love it when they’re cramping our small home. And now there’s a lot more elbow room but it’s no longer the same.

God, I hate saying goodbyes. Knowing my brother, this parting will only be temporary and I’ll be seeing them again soon. Still, it’s a different sort of goodbye. But I won’t try and mess this moment for them. I’ll just continue to keep up with this brave, smiling face and remember these words:

“Don’t be dismayed at goodbyes. Farewells are necessary before we can meet again. And meeting again, after moments or lifetimes, is certain for those who are friends.” – or, in our case, families!

My thoughts and prayers are with my brother, my nephew and my sister-in-law, who will always be loved and welcomed no matter how far and long they’d be gone. I’m missing you already! Ingat!

(don’t mind me here, I’m just being KLSP – kulang lang sa pancit!)

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